simulative fingers feel pain,

as you hear your own heart beat,

as you imagine crawling… climbing up and out.

you stop.

you look down at your own hands as they hold each other,

wrapping each other,

soothing each other,

as if your knuckles would have been bleeding.

you sit.

what an imaginative world we play.

with all the heart ache, and all that pain.

you find yourself sitting, playing, praying, hoping.

you find it.  in all this while,

it’s been quietly waiting for you to realize

everything you have already known.

it’s almost like the light turned on.

all i see is a deep dark sky hidden with the silhouettes of blue.
and the sweetest of lights highlight you.
you’re a memory i wish would stay.
and i know you enough to understand whats happening.

but i fight back the feeling.
i hold back the urge
until i see you again…
serendipitously.
and then, you might be mine.
for just one night.
i can tell you everything i want.
all my secrets.

before all goes gray. before the black sky turns to blue.

then maybe all this will go away.
then maybe everything that is us will matter

hung up my bets in the bedsheets
lustfully crawling knee by knee, hand by hand
straight to your favor.

the chillness in the air encourages sweat
and the touch of your hand causes goosebumps covering my entire body,
i flex in the caress of your fingertips.
and happily i look at you, eager to please. hungry from want. aching with need.

i bloom as a kitten in your glowing light
rolling and twisting,
just keep grasping for more

time never fails to remind

in the quiet hours, in the still nights

you realize all that swirls around you. you’re the gravitational pull you want to be.

so remember that.

reflect on all that you’ve overcome. envision everything you are determined to make happen.

don’t let go. of good thoughts, good surroundings, good people.

and don’t forget to breathe, even in these still nights when you start to question yourself. reassure yourself, and be sure to reassure anyone else that will let you in.

be the light that you are made of. and share it.

eyes close,

i lay.

your fingertips lightly touch my hip, my thigh

this wave of sensation finds my toes and runs right up my spine.

delicate in this aggravated way.  you only tease me

trying to please me.

and with clenched fists grabbing tight on the fabric around me

my backs arch gives nothing but light to our movement.

so you’re closer now.  pulling me closer, tightly

i roll into you,

like a cats back that hasn’t been touched for too long.

when you push, i push and

i pull, you pull

a perfect movement bound by passion

equalized by an ebb and flow.

i never want this to end.

eyes open and

i know

its just

imagination

taking over me.

let me capture you.

 

let me snuggle in your deepest thought.

warm in your madness i call my own,

 

let me be the darkness you hide in

bring your senses to light.  hold you close enough to feel inside me.

 

let me buy time and fall apart for you.

 

the quiet night.

blue light

glows quietly.  orange.

the sullen movement of the freeway keeps me company.

and that’s okay.

and you check on me.  tell me it’s not alright.

but i’m fine.  alone.

listening to the crickets.  feeling an easy breeze.

it’s alright.

with a fire in my belly.  desolate.

i always stop.  always stop to start again.