give me what you’ve got.
suck me dry, test the beast in me.
you know deep down i need the pain.

i feed off of this. i feed off of you. i feed off of us.
because i know the difference that holds you and me

we’ll never be happy without it.

… lover.

take good care of my instinct

don’t let me let go of my fire.

bring me all that newness i call desire

bring it to me for however long i may keep you.

and when you release all that we feel

i’ll keep it safe in my vein.

this certain heat has become a part of me

and i’ll let it feed.

 

suffocated from warm milk

chewing on my own tongue

deaf from hind sight

chest ripped apart

swallowed likeness, moving notions.

i hate you.

smile when i break my own heart thinking that perhaps i can win you over somehow.

i keep finding myself in moments where i might catch you,

but instead find you looking for something or someone else.

eyes closed, my eyes wide open, i thought it was me at first, i thought i was the poison, instead i became the cat’s paw. disabled. neglected.

you never have to feel like you’re deciding on life or death.

you never have to feel sand is falling in your mouth.

you never have to feel so alone, with that body in the room next to you.

heart broken is how you make me feel… swollen. and pouting

hardwood floor.

quietly lit kitchen and entryway.

humming of the refrigerator.

these are the things that keep me company in the early hours of the morning.

bare feet, light sweater.

cold keys, you do me no justice these days.

and in the quiet hours of the early morning, i find that all i have is a warm beating heart. but what does that give you other than the capacity to feel pain.

empty flower vase.

unused library and kitchen table.

steady melody keeping me awake.

these are all just reminders of the lonely place i call my home.

blurry vision, achy chest.

you say i amount to no good. complacent in my skin.

in these quiet hours of the early morning, i find that my skin keeps my likeness safe. but you can’t hide when you are bruised to the core.