Ciara Ashley Johnson

I thought it’d be him. I can feel the sting still deep in my psyche.

I knew for sure it’d be him.

Until the time came to produce and felt nothing coming to me.

I thought it’d be the end.
I knew it deep down inside.
I knew for sure he could be my guiding light.

Until the room felt cold and I had to teach myself to reach no more.

And then there was you. There always was my black light.

The book found me again.

As a teacher to tell me to let go of the emotions with thought and experiment and learn and feel utmost pleasure and play in the deeper end.

I can’t help but constantly question. Constantly think about the next discovery of you.

Driven by a deep rooted ache that won’t let me go until I find the cure.

I like your focus,
Given deliberate.
Courteous with thought, kind in movement.

I like your texture,
Curious with landscape
Hidden softly, carefully felt.

I like your sound,
Sweet symphony delivered with purpose.
Slow like honey, dripping with accuracy.

Tell me that you’re my magic. Then show me.

I can be in love twenty one times and it doesn’t matter.

Because when I look at you, my heart splits and my soul expands.

And in that factor, I’ll give what you ask me to.

I am ready for your warmth, patient for your glorification.

You were a great experiment.
One that I constantly looked forward to learning more about, reaching further into, building with.

But you grew cold so quick, it left my psyche bruised.
My interest losing its spark, feeling a little used.

You were so glorious in the moments,
I was eager to please,
But you pushed away,
Almost gracefully it now seems.

A lovers bliss is hard to hold,
So I bashfully fumbled, ungratefully sold to you.

The closer you get, the more vivid the color.

Imagine what you could feel if you would do more than just touch or taste it.

Only fools waste (something good only to feel what it’s like) to want (something else).

Somehow I am ::hovering quietly to:: not.

Keep me sharp lover.
Take care of my instinct,
Don’t let me let go of my fire.
Bring that newness of desire,
For however long I may keep you.

And when you release that feel…
I’ll keep it safe in my vein.
A certain heat that’s become a part of me.
And I’ll feed.

I’m your beggar.
Crawling on my knees, aching like a fiend.

Come on and give it to me, please.
I’ll take only what I need.

I promise.

Softly spoken
Eyes wide open
Hearts telling her the story to hear.

Legs bare, chest bare
Guarded in that knowing stare
Hearts telling her all the secrets she already knew.

Body still
With curves that kill
Hearts swollen. There’s no room left for cold lovers.

And in the quiet of the nights,
she found that gentle guiding light.
Walking her slow and steady.

Always protected and increasingly ready.

Never try to tame what lives inside me…

No one can, no one will.