I dream of your skin.

Your touch.

Your face.
I dream in color, and it’s full and smooth and sweet and wet.
I dream of our mouths together, holding each other tight.
Our hands touching, tongues tasting.
I dream of our breath exchanging,
perfectly syncing the ebb and flow.
I dream of feeling you slide inside me.
Like waves rushing over my skin, we perfectly collide.
Sweet and salty.

You’re the oceans break I’ve been waiting for.
And I’m begging you to pull me further in.
Every night…
I dream of you.

I thought I was built for this.
I thought I had a deep rooted “when all else fails” mentality of what to do and who to become that was full grown and encompassed.
I thought I could shed the light, onto myself and others.

I thought I was made for this. To be a fighter, and a lover. To quietly misbehave and do what I feel is right.
I thought I was stronger than this.

But I’m not.

I’m soft in every cell, delicately waiting.

I’ll quit.
I’m not going to be pretty, I’m not going to be nice.
I’ll just quit.
I’ll fall apart, I’ll be anxious. I’ll make quick steps.
I’ll be raw.

I’m going to quit you.
I’ll be circumcised. Cut from the cord.
Craving the glory. Desperate and lovely.
Breaking the bond. Breaking our hearts.

I’ll do it.
I’ll fall apart just to pull my own pieces back together.

Always to start again.

Bring me love.
Bring it to me and let me dissect it for everything it might be worth.
Let me taste your skin, graze your neck, feel your body.
Let me breathe you.

Bring your heart.
Show me its glory. Let it open up and display it for me to find.
Let me feel it out, touch the center, find the soft spot, make you come.
Let me.

There is such a void,
A discipline like no other.
A dark space wanting to be filled, knowing to be filled.

There is such a lack,
Such removal of luster.
A space playing it safe I can do without.

What a whirlpool,
A grasping moment,
Grasping for no one that wants in return.

Remove the days of catapults
Of fabrications
Of fake lovers.

Please, just remove yourself away from me.

Drip me with sweat
Hold tight to this weakness that hides between my legs.
Love me for every craving moment that we share.

Uncover my hidden eyes.
Seek the deep obsession that broods between you and I.
Adore is a faded word that can’t hold the strength of you and me.

I know nothing more but this.

Right here.
Right now.

You belong here. You are home.

Eyes open in the moons light.
Then is when I find you in my bed.

With the softest of lips kissing the back of my neck.
They graze against my skin,
down towards my collarbone.

Sweet breath creates the perfect tension.
I turn soft for you in this moment.
As you glide your hands down my spine, I roll into your solvent.

I switch lovely to your vibrancy.
I wrap around you like electricity.

I break free from everything that doesn’t matter.
You make me feel.

And I love every minute of it.

Left with my own devices.
I’m sitting. I’m working, worshiping and loving everything my hands can get hold of.

I’m left with my own skin, my own thoughts, my self love.
I’m dissecting and contemplating, I’m wondering in all these movements.

I’m realizing.

I’m okay. I’m faulted, I’m content with that.
I make decisions with good intentions in all their movements.
I want. And I need. I grasp.

I feel.

I’m human.

How easy it is to fall softly into the memory of how you feel.
Such a gift I was given, sultry in our soothing light.
Such a quiet blessing in sweet disguise.
You pull softly in our own escape,
Gentle and slow to every ache.
A Blissful touch to all my thoughts.
I’m begging you for more.